I want to write right now, but feel so overwhelmed by the sense of awe I have at the wondeer of how far gone wrong things are at the moment. I mean, at one point in the past, I think it was during Obama’s Presidency, I felt like there was a genuine possibility of achieving world peace, or a mutual understanding and cooperative agreement that would at least send us in that general direction. We had a Statesman in charge, and we were going in the right direction. Well, I remember feeling that general sense of optimism. The world keeps a Doomsday Clock to measure our general doom, and I measure in a personal sense of optimism that is sort of the opposite to that. Since the election of our current President, my sense of optiism has sunk from a general dread to a more specific depression, and I hate it.
For me, I feel the loss as a Citizen, and as someone who brought other people to this country believing it would be a great place for them to live. It is good, don’t get mer wrong, but ever since the nation set about the business of Making America Great Again, whatever that harkens back to, it has progressively got worse. There has been the attitude towards immigrants, which a large portion of my family is, and the racial divisions, which affect my family directly because racism and nationalism are not that far off from eachother. The economy is supposedly in a boost, and I think our family feels that. At the same time, our investments in the market are extremely unstable, and that is up and down like a roller coaster, taking the mood along with it. I want to just ignore it, but that is hard to do when I keep wondering if I should sell out and leave it be for a bit, or if I should be trying to manage growth by selling high, buying low, and doing it in quick succession to create better growth. I just don’t know. There is a name for that, and I don’t even know that.
This weekend, two mass shootings took place. They were unrelated, except maybe one triggered the other. Whatever, it is just a highlight to a huge problem that this country keeps trying to ignore, like bad plumbing, as if it hopes it will just go away, or stop itself up with the debris or hard water in the pipes. Perhaps, but the best solution is to get the work done and gex a proper fix in place. We know what the problem is. We know what the solution is. But we have those among us who would rather plug our ears, close our eyes, and scream, and pretend that doing nothing is the best solution.
Right now the media wants to lay this all at the feet of one US Senator. Of course, that is Mitch McConnell. They are calling him Moscow Mitch, which I think is stupid and childish. Labels are never a solution, and applying such to him is no different to calling immigrants rapists and murderers. The media is promoting the idea of not naming the gunmen in the shootings. This more aligns with what should be done with Mitch McConnell. He needs to be removed and forgotten, erased from histoical prominance, and put in a dung heap. The man has been a waste of air for at least as long as since he vowed to obstruct all legislation that Obama wanted to put forth, based on what? Ideology? Or race? Come on Mitch. You are a transparent racist. You are a relic that needs to get out of the way so the nation can heal, progress, and move towards a future that is worth having. Could it be any more obvious what you are when the people you obstruct and fight against are called “progressives?”
Our lousy President is a market manipulator who refuses to disclose his taxes. What could be going on? Ithink the obvious conclusion is that he is making a fortune in his position, while wagging the dog in monumental ways. I don’t think there is an inch more depth to him, or his policies, than that. He is using his position for self-enrichment. He is waving around ideologies and policies that distract the public like a big yellow flag, while dark deeds are done in dark corners, away from view. Why the Hell would he be so vile to our allies and embrace our national enemies? True it is that I think this nation is misguided in how it deals with Russia, North Korea, Iran, and others, but this guy wants to throw our relationships with Europe under the bus for no apparent reason? Well, market destabilization, which is when the money is to be made, especially when you can control the timing of it.
Sure, this writing is an opinion piece. It is not even that. It is an exasparation piece. I am just a man after a simple life. I mostly keep to myself. I have all but given up on trying to make friends in this world. That’s mostly because I am in an area where people don’t like to befriend people who are not of their religion, and I am damn sure that all religion is just a money and power scam. I have watched as my poor grandmother has buried four of her children over the years, then raked money over to a Church from which she gets a fairytale that comforts her with false hope of seeing them again, and I have observed as that Church has become one of the richest organizations on Earth, untaxed, and upon the demands of payment, while holding people’s happiness at the ransom of their fairytales. It is basically pay, or lose the hope of being with their family after they die, which is of course a promise the Church cannot possibly fulfill. Ironically, the obligation to fulfill that promise ends on the death of the person to whome it was made, leaving the Church holding the money. In this, I have watched the poor widow pay a fortune, and go broke, and now, where is the Church? They don’t even check on her, let alone help her. Yet she still believes with all of her subborn mind that she has done the right thing by paying, by praying, by having faith. She has treated me and my family like shit because I let go of her fairytale. It all started when she asked me if I still believed, and I told her no. That was the very day things changed for us, and she started talking to me differently.
Well, as I said, this is an exasparation piece. I need a change. I feel that right down in my boots. That requirement is no threat to my wife, my family, or my life. Those things are stable. But it is time to clear the stage, and set a new scene. It is time for some of the actors to leave, but the main cast remain. This play has worn me down from so many sides. I have processed it to death. It has not helped me to grow in any positive direction. It has only worn me down to almost nothing, wether we are on the political outlook, or the personal one. I don’t feel depressed. I don’t feel depressed like I was in high school. Maybe I am, and I just don’t know what it feels like because it is a different depression than it was in school. It is something I need to explore more. It is probably the rut I feel like I am in. A change needs to be made. Maybe that comes in the form of a new hobby. Maybe it is time to write that book that I have been waiting to appear in me. Maybe it is time to fix a cup of coffee, then throw it on the ground, just to do something I have never done before. Ground. Ground the beans, then throw their tea upon the ground. Do it before I end up in the ground. There is something grounded in that.
Time to end this senseless ramble.
KJB