A very dear friend has been online this morning, afternoon where she is at as she has traveled beck to the UK for work. The conversation has provoked thought that I would like to explore deeper. The question of identity comes into it, as does the question of how am I adapting? There is family to consider as well as myself in asking “Where am I?”
Being where I literally am, it is not easy for family to understand how living away from one’s native culture for so long changes who you are to a level beyond their comprehending. I know that comes off as some sort of elitist self-pity, but it is the case. I am grateful for it too, because it helps me to gain an understanding of what my wife and kids are going through now as they are new to my country, which, as helpful as my family would like to be, is impossible for them to understand! Most Americans buy into the American Myth, and dismiss out of hand any troubles adapting or cultural longings because they think that everything is better here in America as though everywhere else in the world is defined as “third world.” Even if it is better in quality or content here, the truth is, you think of what you are used to as better. So better for my Brits is British on many things! There are a lot of things here they have been truly amazed at, and have thoroughly enjoyed, and in many cases these things have been “as compared to…” But there are also things that have been sent for from Worcester, Worcestershire, UK.
Happily, because the lifestyle in the US allows for much greater freedom than it does in the UK, which can be quantified and measured, but not by the unskilled in such matters, such as me, I can say that my family are doing well here! We are lucky to have gone from living in a 900 foot council house in the UK, to a 2.3 acre property, 1930 foot house with horses, here in Nevada. I have my grandparents to thank for such opportunities and making this transition possible! We are an hour from Las Vegas, so the amenities of the city life are at hand, but that hour separates us into the country life, plenty of space to move about, and only the lights of the city glowing on the horizon at night to even hint or remind us that it is there. Missus is working, but not in the city. She is contracting freelance work off the internet, so she is free to work when she needs to, and not commute from the bedroom to do it, though a laptop is available should she decide she needs the outdoor air, or to work on the road between here and the next small town up from here.
So to the question of adapting, I think things are going swimmingly. Some things are still in flux. I expect them to be for a long time. But some things have taken root quickly in my family, and in me, which help to remove the toxicity that a former culture can invade into a person. The horses are a huge part of that. Of the three here, we are working on a painted mare now to get her to the point she can be trail ridden. Throw either of the boys on top of a horse that refuses to move when wanted, or who moves unexpectedly when not wanted, and memories of England are banished from the mind while fear and concentration take over. Who can consider any kind of homesickness when on top of a beast who weighs more than seven times your weight? There are many such activities here, such as my missus learning to drive a car, everyone enjoying quad biking, chickens, ducks, dogs, cats, and horses to keep, more to plan for, and a landscape that is as foreign and stunning as Mars for them? The strongest strings for any is family in the UK. But the Internet has made it so much easier and cheaper to keep in touch with all of them! As for the everyday things such as light switches and door handles, things work better over here. In the UK, every vacuum cleaner we ever had would work great for four months from new, then begin to cut out after overheating during use. It would have to be left to cool, and would cut out again before long whenever you went to finish the job. It just has not happened to us yet over here. And there is more floor to vacuum clean! Things like that make adapting here very easy!
I have a million other thoughts to consider in this, but frankly, it is time to get out of bed and get ready to train a horse today! So I am going to do what has to be done, and get up and on with my day! Typical of how we are getting on here!